Thursday, April 28, 2011

The Flower Girl Delimma

Happy Thursday all! I am back from the land of final exams. At least for the time being...the yucky 20 page paper on "gender differences in elementary and middle school age students' study habits" and my final exam for my educational statistics class are not out of the way yet. But, luckily, I have a break for the weekend. Corey is coming to visit! :)

I don't think I have mentioned this before but I am an only child. I asked for a sister every year for Christmas for years when my parents would take me to visit the mall Santa, but it was never meant to be.  I don't have a younger sister and I don't have any nieces. My father has one brother so I have a female cousin on his side who is only a few months younger than me. She will be one of two maids of honor in my wedding. 

My mom is one of five sisters and was the last one to start her family. Consequently, I have cousins who have children almost as old as I am. I have no four or five year old female relatives. 

One of my cousins does, however, have the most precious little boy and girl in the entire universe. They are simply beautiful and sweet children. Of course, they were the natural choice for flower girl and ring bearer. The little boy is perfect ring bearer age - he is five. He is old enough to follow directions but still young enough that he's super adorable. His sister is eight. As I've started to talk about hypothetically asking her to be my flower girl, several friends have discouraged this because she will be nine at the time of the wedding and "too old." I'm not a huge fan of junior bridesmaids - unless we had a large number of young family members. 

I haven't asked these children yet. Or any of my attendants actually. I do understand the cuteness factor of very young flower girls. The Knot recommends they be between the ages of four and eight. One of my cousins was four years old when my parents got married and he was the ring bearer. He saw the crowd of people at the ceremony and promptly threw a temper tantrum and refused to walk down the aisle when it was his turn. So, there may be advantages in choosing older child attendants. 

This little girl is precious. Petite and blonde like me. There is obviously a family resemblance even though she is identical to my cousin's childhood photos. I love that I remember the day my cousin announced she was expecting and I love that I've watched her daughter grow. I love that she'll be part of my family and my life forever. So, of course it makes perfect sense to me that she would be my flower girl. 

My question to you is: Unless, of course, she doesn't want to do it, is it acceptable to have a nine-year-old flower girl? If you were a guest at my wedding, what would your opinion be?


  1. I think it is totally acceptable to have a 9 year old flower girl. I think she will feel honored that you have asked her and she will take the role very seriously. Plus, you wont have to worry about her crying or running down the aisle or refusing to do anything. I think it is something she will always remember and she will treasure the experience. If I attended a wedding with a 9 year old flower girl, I wouldnt think anything of it at all. More importantly, I think the idea of having family or people you are close to stand up in your wedding is what is most important. It will be nice for you to walk down the aisle and see the people you love and treasure the most.

  2. I think that having a 9 year old flower girl is perfectly fine! My flower girl was a little older than most and it worked out a lot better behaviorly speaking than my ring bearers who were a little younger. I think that the most important thing is that YOU have what YOU want because it is YOUR wedding! At the end of the day, the most important thing is that everything was what you wanted it to be :)

  3. I think it is appropriate, too. It's really hard to tell the ages of children these days, and if she wears a dress that would make her look like a child/little girl as opposed to a young adult I think it is totally appropriate. Children are very popular in England for weddings as you saw today probably.


Thank you for stopping by!